Here’s another unfinished children’s book I’ve been working on. I think the illustrations would be SO fun to create, but alas, I am stuck once again. (My next book will NOT rhyme. Why must I torture myself, so?)

Goldilocks and the 3 Hairdos

by Karen Windness

Each year in the kingdom at a fashionable ball,
A contest is held for the fairest of all.

To gowns and to slippers the trophies would go,
But the highest of prizes was “Best Hair in Show.”

Tailors and cobblers would battle for glory,
But stylists, it seemed, were the stars of the story.

(Something here about how Goldie Locks got into hair styling.)

Goldie Lock’s Shop, three years in a row,
claimed ‘Salon #1’ and ‘Best Hair in Show’.

The first to Miss Goldie’s the day of the dance,
was a Princess named Beauty, still dazed from her trance.

“Oh Goldie,” she yawned, “My hair is a snooze.”
“If I go like this, I’m certain to lose!”

“Let Goldie whip up a look that’s just right
and you’ll take the cup for best hair-do tonight.”

With a press and foam and a some perk-me-up gel,
Beauty’s new ‘do cast a powerful spell.

But who stopped the Princess on route to the ball?
The wolf with the hair that was baddest of all.

“I can’t pass the guard at the castle gate
unless I arrive with an invited date.”

“So pretty princess, let’s go to that dance!”
Said Beauty, “With you? Sorry. No chance.”

“Your breath is quite nasty, your hair is a yawn,
and there’s ‘No Dogs Allowed’ on the castle lawn.”

“Then I’ll huff and I’ll puff and I’ll blow down your ‘do!”
Before Beauty could swoon her hair was blown through.

Back at the shop perched high in a chair
Rapunzel, Rapunzel cried, “Off with my hair!”

“These long knotty waves are tripping my toes.
A girl needs her feet to dance Do-Si-Dos.”

“You’ll be free to cut loose at the ball tonight.”
Trust Goldie to give you a style that’s just right.”

With an architect’s plan and an artisan’s eye
Goldie braided and pinned ‘Punzel’s hair to the sky.

But who barred Rapunzel outside of the ball?
The wolf with the mane that was baddest of all.

“Rapunzel, Rapunzel, Take me to the dance!”
“Wolfy, with you? Sorry. No chance!”

“I’d rather be trapped in a windowless tower
than dance with a wolf so in need of a shower.”

“Then I’ll huff and I’ll puff and I’ll blow down your ‘do!”
Rapunzel wigged out but her hair was blown through.

The last to arrive at Goldilock’s Shop
was a red-hooded lass with a flat carrot top.

“I won’t please a prince with this hood-shaped hair.
Can you give me a style with some fire and flair?”

“You’ll spark the eye of a prince tonight.
Trust Goldie to cook up a ‘do that’s just right.”

With some dynamite dye and bomb-diggity spray
Red’s fiery head was a sizzling display.

But who startled Red on her way to the ball?
The wolf with the fur that was baddest of all.

“Little Red Darling, take me to that dance!”
“I know about wolves, so NO. Not a chance!”

“Your nose is too long and your ears are too big
and you look like you’ve recently eaten a pig.”

“Then I’ll huff and I’ll puff and I’ll blow down your ‘do!”
But Red kept her head and to Goldie’s she flew.

The wolf chased Red blindly and was unable to stop
when Little Red ran into Goldilock’s Shop.

Then the worstest of wolves with the baddest of hair
found himself buckled in Goldilock’s chair.

With a wash and a comb and a shave and de-lice,
the baddest of wolves cleaned up nicer than nice.

Then Red and the wolf (who now was her date)
arrived at the dance not a minute too late.

(This ending needs WORK!)

The prince gave out prizes – “Best Color” to Red
Then “Curliest”, “Straightest” and “Most Hairless Head.”

But when it was time to name Number One ‘Do
The judges where stuck and just couldn’t pick who.

The crowed grumbled loudly, the prince made the call,
“It appears there’s a tie for Hair Fairest of All!”

Rapunzel and Beauty, you’ve blown us away.
Your styles are so funky, you both win today!

(Then something about award to the stylists. Big bad winning a prize. Then do he and Goldie set up shop together?)